So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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