Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
