Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(424): View more from California

Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?

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(765): View more from Indiana

It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.

(1-765): View more from Indiana

Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.

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(404): View more from Georgia

Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night

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(907): View more from Alaska

I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.

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(386): View more from Florida

If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.

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