Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...