My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
