her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
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