I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
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Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
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