and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
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Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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