Well douche your snatch and let's go!
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Randomize
