What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize
