Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I am puke
id be glad to
porn star boner night. come get it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
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