do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize
