Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT