They should really pass out barf bags in church
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Randomize
