Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize