Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park

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(917): It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park http://tfl.nu/yu5j

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(337): View more from Louisiana

Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?

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(337): Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am? http://tfl.nu/uaqy

Replies (11) Good night (4075) Bad night (1046)
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(314): View more from Missouri

I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.

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(314): I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk. http://tfl.nu/s5cc

Replies (15) Good night (6326) Bad night (1017)
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(317): View more from Indiana

Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.

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(317): Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy. http://tfl.nu/mg1s

Replies (14) Good night (1304) Bad night (2811)
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(907): View more from Alaska

I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘

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(907): I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘 http://tfl.nu/3lq0

Replies (11) Good night (2725) Bad night (955)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.

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(215): I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood. http://tfl.nu/t851

Replies (3) Good night (1943) Bad night (682)
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(631): View more from New York

In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.

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(631): In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out. http://tfl.nu/wzbc

Replies (4) Good night (3396) Bad night (718)
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(773): View more from Illinois

Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.

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(773): Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame. http://tfl.nu/s2ml

Replies (3) Good night (1089) Bad night (584)
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(750): View more from

Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."

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(750): Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on." http://tfl.nu/43jv

Replies (1) Good night (448) Bad night (475)
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(775): View more from Nevada

Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone

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(775): Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone http://tfl.nu/zeql

Replies (7) Good night (444) Bad night (697)
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(281): View more from Texas

We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.

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(281): We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron. http://tfl.nu/cli2

Replies (1) Good night (545) Bad night (347)
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(626): View more from California

i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over

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(626): i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over http://tfl.nu/mit8

Replies (1) Good night (324) Bad night (573)
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(319): View more from Iowa

You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin

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(319): You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin http://tfl.nu/3xwn

Replies (5) Good night (309) Bad night (836)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.

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(715): Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands. http://tfl.nu/vpbs

Replies (2) Good night (545) Bad night (346)
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(828): View more from North Carolina

Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?

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(828): Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive? http://tfl.nu/mouo

Replies (0) Good night (327) Bad night (248)

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