What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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