What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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