Rock
Scissors
Fuck
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize