is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
me + whiskey = a bad person
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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