My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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