drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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