Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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