she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
