that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
i just google imaged poop.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Randomize