I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Randomize
