I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
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