How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
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