U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
