Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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