ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
