Texts From Last Night

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  (914): View more from New York

  I faked an abortion last night.

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  (914): I faked an abortion last night. http://tfl.nu/q8tt
  Replies (20) Good night (720) Bad night (2741)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.

  (206): View more from Washington

  High?

  (425): View more from Washington

  hahahahaha turkey breast

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  (425): ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector. (206): High? (425): hahahahaha turkey breast http://tfl.nu/8hm7
  Replies (41) Good night (3664) Bad night (659)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.

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  (208): all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem. http://tfl.nu/lmoj
  Replies (32) Good night (3341) Bad night (1340)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter

  (310): View more from California

  your less of a man for seeing that

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  (201): know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter (310): your less of a man for seeing that http://tfl.nu/root
  Replies (13) Good night (836) Bad night (3473)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.

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  (856): smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life. http://tfl.nu/69tk
  Replies (34) Good night (7395) Bad night (800)
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  (925): View more from California

  DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR

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  (925): DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR http://tfl.nu/ynfk
  Replies (42) Good night (11130) Bad night (1346)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour

  (513): View more from Ohio

  its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem

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  (574): he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour (513): its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem http://tfl.nu/ygfh
  Replies (6) Good night (917) Bad night (3125)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.

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  (610): This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind. http://tfl.nu/lf45
  Replies (15) Good night (4470) Bad night (1092)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?

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  (908): Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good? http://tfl.nu/2d9n
  Replies (6) Good night (2254) Bad night (694)
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  (252): View more from North Carolina

  The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse

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  (252): The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse http://tfl.nu/x8q4
  Replies (9) Good night (795) Bad night (1780)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?

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  (970): Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears? http://tfl.nu/m0sz
  Replies (4) Good night (729) Bad night (991)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...

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  (503): Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat... http://tfl.nu/b2lc
  Replies (2) Good night (426) Bad night (1092)
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  (310): View more from California

  I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...

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  (310): I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now... http://tfl.nu/9bsa
  Replies (2) Good night (622) Bad night (268)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.

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  (214): I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef. http://tfl.nu/ln6b
  Replies (2) Good night (250) Bad night (274)
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  (619): View more from California

  you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.

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  (619): you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's. http://tfl.nu/zax5
  Replies (5) Good night (435) Bad night (279)

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