Texts From Last Night

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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.

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  (504): Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea. http://tfl.nu/a9pb
  Replies (51) Good night (1365) Bad night (11657)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc

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  (630): Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc http://tfl.nu/6dlb
  Replies (50) Good night (666) Bad night (3000)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl

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  (814): you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl http://tfl.nu/ed1u
  Replies (24) Good night (1069) Bad night (6499)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.

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  (484): I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting. http://tfl.nu/ejol
  Replies (15) Good night (6006) Bad night (1611)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.

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  (+61): You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes. http://tfl.nu/b96e
  Replies (2) Good night (2164) Bad night (1015)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.

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  (317): I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one. http://tfl.nu/jdn1
  Replies (6) Good night (1564) Bad night (819)
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  (909): View more from California

  I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.

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  (909): I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today. http://tfl.nu/n0ax
  Replies (4) Good night (1266) Bad night (565)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way

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  (702): Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from? (702): Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way http://tfl.nu/vsyq
  Replies (4) Good night (1778) Bad night (622)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog

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  (907): You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog http://tfl.nu/ud9g
  Replies (6) Good night (1165) Bad night (629)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.

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  (480): her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying. http://tfl.nu/a94q
  Replies (7) Good night (716) Bad night (1146)
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  (562): View more from California

  Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car

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  (562): Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car http://tfl.nu/galf
  Replies (6) Good night (1289) Bad night (462)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?

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  (416): Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best? http://tfl.nu/9x4p
  Replies (0) Good night (758) Bad night (338)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.

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  (715): We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her. http://tfl.nu/sx8g
  Replies (4) Good night (1176) Bad night (450)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  By piano you mean.....

  (719): View more from Colorado

  Like literally a piano.

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.

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  (719): My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked. (505): By piano you mean..... (719): Like literally a piano. (505): Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing. http://tfl.nu/b7lv
  Replies (5) Good night (1007) Bad night (430)
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  (661): View more from California

  Are you okay?

  (1-661): View more from California

  I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!

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  (661): Are you okay? (1-661): I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay! http://tfl.nu/70id
  Replies (1) Good night (448) Bad night (527)

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