i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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