I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
