Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(813): View more from Florida

i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.

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(865): View more from Tennessee

Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Wow that was a lesbian tornado.

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(252): View more from North Carolina

My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business

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(815): View more from Illinois

My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.

(580): View more from Oklahoma

....this is what your political science major is getting you?

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(201): View more from New Jersey

He's cheating on her.

(973): View more from New Jersey

Are you sure it wasn't her?

(201): View more from New Jersey

I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.

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(713): View more from Texas

I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?

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(530): View more from California

I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!

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