Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
