My brain says no but my pants say off.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
True strength comes from lack of pants
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.