that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize