Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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