Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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