i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
