he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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