I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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