im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Someone signed my nipple.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
