sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
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