Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I forget how to act sober
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