she looked like the before picture.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Randomize
