It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
