There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
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