I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
