we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
17 year olds will be the death of me.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
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